“Naksha” (2006) – Hindi Action/ Adventure – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015″

Time to whisk ourselves off to India for a special “shared review” with our good friend Stephen of “Gweilo Ramblings” to put a proper finish to our March “Thrilling Adventures!!” Movie Review Festival. Our final film? The 2006 Hindi action/adventure “Naksha”. What? Not a Korean film? Nope… thought I’d throw Stephen a little curve this time out and lure him away from our usual movie selections to something a little more different and unusual… and nothing says “different and unusual” like Bollywood…  😉

Thanks Miyu. You know I am always looking forward to our collaborative blogging, and watching some proper Bollywood fun is always on my to-do list, even if I never seem to get around to it.

The synopsis goes like this: “After the death of an archaeologist, Kapil Malhotra. 20 years later his frivolous playboy son, Vicky attempts to take up his father’s quest to find the legendary Armour of Karna taken by the God Indra in the epic story Mahabharata. However Vicky does not seem to have any clue to meet this challenge, so to proceed he is forced to delve deep into the jungles of India with the help of an ancient map, and his elder half-brother, Veer. Together they will have to join hands to defeat an evil rival Baali who wants to uncover the armour only to selfishly use it to become an unstoppable immortal conqueror that no one could destroy.”

Okie Dokie… sounds like we’re in the right movie for some “Raiders” style action, and Bollywood certainly knows how to do things with their own style, so if nothing else I expect things to get trippy… and hear some catchy music along the way, Hehehe!!. So… without any further fuss, let’s get to it, shall we?

“The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of of the Yik Yak” (1984) – French Adventure/ Sexploitation – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015″

So… have any of my Gentle Visitors ever wondered what “Raiders” would be like if you mixed it up with a little vintage Eurosex naughtiness ala “Barbarella”? No? Well, what kind of globe-trotting Catgirl adventuress would I be if I didn’t dig deep in the DVD vault for something a little spicy… a little racy… a wee bit risqué to really show you just how much “Raiders” has influenced films from all around the world. This time out, the 1984 French film “The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik Yak” based on… of all things… an odd little bondage/fetish cartoon series. Yep, I kid you not. 😉

Our synopsis goes like this: “Sweet naive virginal Gwendoline leaves her convent school and arrives in China in a box on a quest to find the fate of her lost father who was last seen searching for a rare butterfly in the legendary “Land of the Yik Yak”. Saved from white slavers and a fate worse than death by her loyal maidservant and a devil-may-care adventurer, soon she is knee-deep in trouble. Along the way she and her companions must face pirates, scoundrels, vicious native tribesmen, poisonous desert windstorms, and a lost race of Amazon warriors guarding a volcanic mountain full of diamonds.”

Hmmmm? Yes… I know… Sounds a bit naughty… (Just the sort of film to tease my sweet Carolyn… and convince her I really am a nutty lil’ dweeb for sure. 😉 ) but it also sounds really campy and way fun too. So for a bit of jungle adventure fun the way only the French could manage it, let’s all kick back and enjoy the fun together shall we? 😉

“Treasure of the Amazon” (1985) – Mexican Jungle/ Adventure/ Exploitation – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015″

Time to swing by Mexico for a peek at 1985’s Jungle Adventure exploitation classic “Treasure of the Amazon” by Mexican director René Cardona Jr., the latest addition to our March “Thrilling Adventures!!” Movie Review Festival. Deadly jungle action, topless Amazon women, headhunters, poison darts, a sadistic ex-Nazi on a hunt for gold, a river of diamonds full of piranhas and killer crocodiles, and all the other exploitation film goodness you’d expect in a good 80’s “B” movie… 😉

Our synopsis reads: “In the depths of the lush, steamy Amazon jungle, rife with exotic and dangerous wildlife, a group of adventurers embark on a quest to discover a legendary river reportedly filled with diamonds “the size of your eyes” as well as precious jewels and gold, and in the process finds itself enveloped in incomprehensible barbarism. At the mercy of this mysterious jungle labyrinth, the treasure hunters are forced into fierce battles with vicious ruthless headhunters, ferocious alligators, piranhas, a tribe of topless female warriors, and, equally disturbing, the greed of their own colleagues, raising the question “Which is more treacherous, the greed of man or the perils of the jungle?”

Yep… a steamy impenetrable jungle… a treasure… deadly dangers… and perilous adventure. Sounds like this one fits our bill. Throw in some topless Amazon women and a nasty Nazi fugitive and I’m thinking they are really shooting to cover all the bases… Hehehe!! But seeing is believing, so let’s get to it then, shall we o’ Gentle Visitors?

“Sky Pirates” (1986) – Australian Adventure/ Fantasy – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015″

Whew!! Our whirlwind globe-trotting March “Thrilling Adventures!!” Movie Review Festival continues with a quick layover in Australia for a look at 1986’s “Raiders” spunky Aussie wanabee “Sky Pirates” (or “Dakota Harris” as it’s known in German releases). 😉

Synopsis anybody? 😉 “WW2 Australia, August 1945. Flight Lieutenant Dakota Harris is called upon to fly a classified mission in an American DC-3 transport from a secret Australian airbase to Washington DC. On board is an American General and archeologist Reverend Mitchell along with one-third of an ancient stone tablet. The plane gets caught in a mysterious electrical storm and crash-lands in a sea, filled with long-lost ships. Rescued and brought back to Australia, Dakota finds himself court-martialed due to a false testimony by his co-pilot Squadron Leader Savage. Dakota escapes and gets help from Mitchell’s beautiful and feisty daughter Melanie. Together they set out to stop the evil Savage, who is after the 3 pieces of the stone tablet and their enormous power when combined together. A power which can be used for good… or for evil.”

World War 2… ancient astronauts… lost civilizations… the eerie heads of Easter Island… the powers of alien antimatter… daring aerial action… two-fisted wise cracking hero… and a pretty female sidekick. Yep. This sounds about right. So what the heck are we waiting for? Adventure awaits!! 🙂

“The Treasure Hunter” (2009) – Taiwanese Martial Art Adventure/ Romance – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015″

The month continues and the weather improves hereabouts, so now we’re off to Taiwan for our latest entry in our March “Thrilling Adventures!! Movie Review Festival” and a look at 2009’s “The Treasure Hunter”. It’s East meets West as we take a look a what “Raiders” might be if you spiced it up with a whole lotta Wuxia swordplay storytelling and let it go all crazy… Asian style.

Our synopsis goes like this: “Qiao Fei is a relic expert with a gritty past. When his mentor’s daughter is held hostage over a map with a deadly history, the rugged warrior whips into action. Chaos erupts as he swoops in to the rescue and scours the sands for legendary riches rumored to be buried deep in China’s northwest desert. Chased by the shadowy “Sandstorm Legion” and challenged at every step by countless greedy adversaries, Qiao Fei faces danger at every turn to uncover the lost city – but, perhaps some treasures were never meant to be found…”

Well now. That certainly sounds promising. The Trailer has the right look, and it seems to meet all our Festival requirements, so let’s all give it a look, shall we? This wee lady’s not adverse to a lil’ Kung Fu creeping into my story now and again for fun, and Chinese films are nothing if not over-the-top when it comes to doing the whole “adventure” thing. 😉

“Secret of the Incas” (1954) – American Adventure/ Romance – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015″

Time for our latest installment in our March “Thrilling Adventures!!” Movie Review Festival here at the old Litterbox, with a trip to 1954 and a look at a classic old film, “Secret of the Incas”, starring Charlton Heston and Nicole Maury. One look at it and you’d be immediately struck by its resemblance to a certain adventure film starring Harrison Ford… Coincidence? Hmmmm?? Let’s find out. 😉

Our synopsis goes like this: “An ancient Incan folklore legend states that the Inca Empire was destroyed by their Gods when a gold and jeweled sunburst was stolen from the Temple of the Sun centuries ago by Spanish Invaders, and that the ancient civilization will be reborn once the treasure is returned. Harry Steele, a down-on-his-luck adventurer, part-time tour guide and full-time rogue, is seeking the artifact, as is his nemesis Edward ‘Ed’ Morgan. Along the way, Harry finds his attempts to uncover the treasure complicated by his becoming entangled in the troubles of lovely fugitive Elena Antonescu, an Iron Curtain refugee seeking help in reaching safety in the United States. Passions flare, greed rears its ugly head promising danger and the ever-present threat of death to any seeking to recover the hidden Secret of the Incas!!”

Hmmmm? So… never remember seeing this one on TV waaaay back when? Wonder why? This wee Catgirl knows she certainly does… Luckily I scored a really nice copy of this one on DVD just in time for our Festival. So, let’s grab our adventure gear, slip on our trusty bush hat and head off to exotic Peru for some classic romance, adventure, and thrills on the trail of the “Secret of the Incas”.

“Diamonds of Kilimandjaro” (1983) – French Jungle/ Adventure/ Sexploitation – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015″

So after our lil’ excursion to Russia and a movie that was actually pretty darn good… how about we jump in the wayback machine to return to the wild euro-trash cinema of the 1980’s for our next “Thrilling Adventures!! March Movie Review Festival” offering here at the ol’ Litterbox and a look at a film reputed to be one of the worst ever made by infamous euro-sleaze director Jess Franco, 1983’s “Diamonds of Kilimandjaro”.

Our synopsis goes like this: “A group of greedy explorers and soldiers of fortune take a safari deep into uncharted Africa to search for the daughter of a dying woman lost years before as a child in a plane crash. That child, Diana, has grown to womanhood as the White Goddess of a tribe of vicious natives guarding the secret of a horde of diamonds worth millions. Will their greed, lust, and murderous plots result in riches or death for them all in the heart of the savage jungle?”

So this time out we get promised two-fisted heroes, a treasure of diamonds, and even a spunky jungle girl to boot! Somehow though… I have the feeling it’s all gonna go spectacularly bad…. 😉 But I’m a big girl now… and suitably warned, I’m ready to experience the horror that is… “Diamonds of Kilimandjaro”.

“Adventure Has A Name…” – Bonus Video Giggle – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015″

… and that name is… Dora… “Dora the Explorer”. Ever wonder just what a big budget live action theatrical film could be if you based it on an educational children’s show targeting pre-schoolers? I certainly have. (No! Really!… I’m kinda goofy like that… ) Well wonder no more… She’s here and she’s ready to hike up her “big girl panties” and take on the nastiest global menaces out there in the name of adventure (Well… OK… the nastiest ones that can be the foes of an animated 7 year old girl…) with all her friends and the lovable characters you all remember…

She got her Map…. she’s got her backpack… and she’s ready to do some “Exploring”… proving once and for all, “Big” Adventures are for “Little” girls too!! 😉

Look out world… it’s Dora as you’ve never seen her before… Hehehehe!!

Dear goodness… but I could never imagined this was real in a million years… and I figured we needed a little “Intermission” laugh…

“Skalolazka and the Last of the Seventh Cradle” (2007) aka “Скалолазка и последний из седьмой колыбели” – Russian Action/ Adventure – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015″

So.. our “Thrilling Adventures!!” March 2015 Movie Review Festival is officially underway, and in the spirit of all Globe-Trotting Adventurers, we head waaaay waaaay to the other side of Terra Incognito. Well… Russia actually… for our first cinematic adventure gem. It’s 2007’s “Tomb Raider” wannabe “Skalolazka and the Last of the Seventh Cradle”. Neko’s been on the prowl for this one for quite a while. Russian film can be remarkably stubborn when it comes to getting any kind of English friendly DVD release, and this one is no exception. In fact… the only release outside of the Russian Region 5 unsubtitled one is… weirdly enough… a French Region 2 that came with no subtitles at all… and no Russian audio language track either! Yep. It was a straight “dubbed into French” release that was about as worthless for this wee kitten as you might get. D’ohh!!

Synopsis? Sketchy at best, but here goes: “An exciting story about incredible adventures of Alena Ovchinnikova a female rock climber, expert in ancient languages ​​who comes into possession of an ancient artifact of enormous unknown power and by the fate’s will, becomes the savior of human civilization.”

Yep. It took a bit of prowling about to locate some Russian subtitles… in Cyrillic script… that yours truly could work her obsessive Catgirl magic upon to give me some reasonably workable English translated ones to make watching this one possible. Whew!! Yep… my lovely “dorogaya” thinks I’m crazy… and maybe she’s right. 😉 The only way you’ll know for certain is to “Read On” o’ Gentle Visitors and see for yourself…

“Raiders of the Lost Ark” (1981) – “Thrilling Adventures!! March 2015 – Miyuki’s Memories”

“California: 1981 – A blazing sun beat down on the land, raising rippled heatwaves on the horizon as intrepid jungle explorer Miyuki lay in the tall grass and watched the animals drink at the nearby waterhole. To the uninspired eye, they might have seemed nothing more than a couple of stray mongrel dogs lapping away at a puddle leftover from last night’s cooling rain, but little Miyuki knew better…. Squinting her eyes, the haze revealed that they were in fact tawny lions slaking their thirst before the hunt. But there were other foes… more savage than even these… lurking amid the savanna grass… for somewhere nearby she knew the deadly warriors of the Mkombé tribe were hot on her trail, fiercely angry at her for daring to trespass onto their tribal lands in search of Professor Samuels and his lost safari…”

Yep… that’s pretty much how the Summer of 1981 went for this lady. Warm sultry days playing about in the grassy meadows on the edge of my neighborhood and nearby park, dressed in my “safari outfit” and totting around an old leather purse full of snacks and all my “jungle stuff”. Very few things can compare to an 8 ½ year old’s imagination… especially a wee girl so full of wonder and wild imagination as I had back then. While other kids played… most days I spent “having adventures”. Sometimes along with other kids in the neighborhood, but often times all alone. Back then was a simpler time, and you could actually do that without worrying about any crazy kidnapping psycho jumping out and snatching a kid away.

Those adventures were fueled by a plethora of Saturday morning TV filled with old movies, serials, and oodles of Black & White adventure stories from decades past. Along with horror movies and my afternoon Kung-Fu films, these were the things that shaped this odd lil lady into the goofy woman she is today. Once in a great while I’d even go to a Saturday afternoon movie matinée at our local theater if either my Grandma or Dad could be convinced to take me. Oh my goodness, yes… and it was the Summer of 1981 when lil’ Miyuki first encountered Indiana Jones… 😉

Recently my mind has slipped back to those carefree days and all the fond memories I have of them, so it seemed only fitting to share them all with you Gentle Visitors by doing a “Nekolishous” review of that classic adventure film…. and… to gently pester my fellow blogging friends to share their own reminiscences as well. So without further adieu, let’s get right to it! 🙂