“Urumi” aka “ഉറുമി” (2011) – Malayalam Historical Action/ Romance

This time out it’s a trip to sunny India for a look at the Malayalam language action epic, “Urumi”. Lots of vengeance driven butt kicking action old school style, as we get a chance to see just what sort of Martial Arts stuff was going on in India way back when.

Our synopsis goes like this: “Urumi” is set against the backdrop of the fierce warrior clans of northern Kerala on the Malabar Coast of India in the sixteenth century and focuses on legendary warrior Kelu Nayanar, a man with an epic mission of revenge. His target is Dom Vasco da Gama, the Viceroy of the Portuguese Empire in India. Seeking to avenge his father’s death at da Gama’s own hands, Kelu Nayanar, along with the aid of fierce Muslim warrior princess Ayesha of the famed Arakkal Sultanate of Cannanore, and supported by Vavvali, his childhood friend, must track his mission through the wild roads of treachery, treason and a hidden passion to reach a master plan to create his own local army to stand against the mighty Portuguese empire. His only weapon… a legendary golden urumi ribbon sword, specially made from the left over ornaments of the dead women and children who were burnt alive in the massacre of a Mecca Ship, Miri, commanded to be set on fire and drowned by Vasco da Gama during his second visit to Kerala in AD 1502.”

Mmmmmm!!! Crazy weapons to master… evil foreign invaders to kick the beejeebits out of… a beautiful warrior princess to woo…. some prerequisite singing and dancing numbers to do… and some big screen Martial Arts battle action to pull off? Sounds like our hunky Hero Kelu certainly has his work cut out for him. So what the heck are we waiting for? Let’s all “Read On” shall we?

“Shaapit: The Cursed” (2010) – Hindi Ghost/ Horror/ Romance

It’s back to India for a look at a film that’s been sitting in my big ol’ pile of unwatched DVD’s for quite a while, 2010′s Hindi Ghost/ Romance “Shaapit: The Cursed”.

Our synopsis for it goes: “Shaapit is the story of a young girl (Shweta Agarwal), who is trapped by a terrible curse that will not allow any of the daughters of her family to have love or marriage, punishing them and their lovers only with horrible death. When a young man, Aman (Aditya Narayan) falls in love with her, he wishes to free her from this curse and is willing to face even the deadliest of his fears, not knowing what evil awaits him in this quest.”

Ghosts… curses… and romance? All in the same movie? Ummmm? Wait a minute…. So how come it’s taken this goofy lil’ Catgirl so long to actually get around to watching this one? I mean… this wee lady is all about spooky romance stories…. All I can figure is that time and again I’ve picked it out… looked at that intimidating 2½ hour run time and then said to myself…. “Maybe later… when I’ve got more time.”

But… no more. With a Sunday night free… and my sweetie to cuddle with during the scary parts, it was finally time to check this one out. Lately my film choices have been a bit disappointing for the most part, can India break that streak and make me one happy lil’ kitten again? Let’s all find out shall we?

“Ragini MMS” (2011) – Hindi Ghost/ Horror

Another new week…. and another new Review is upon us… Oooohhh… and it seems the dreaded “Curse of the Shaky Cam Horror Movies” is sticking with this wee Catgirl like evil dryer lint to my favorite sweater as we are off to India this time out for their latest addition to the recent deluge of such efforts to hit DVD release, “Ragini MMS”.

Our synopsis reads: “Ragini (Kainaz Motivala) and her boyfriend, Uday (Raj Kumar Yadav) plan a naughty weekend rendezvous to have sex for the first time at a friends desolate bungalow in the midst of a forest outside Mumbai. Of course, Uday also has some other devious plans of his own: the entire house has been rigged with cameras so he can make an amateur sex tape of his tryst with Ragini and sell it off to kick start an “acting career”.

However that turns out to be the very least of their problems as things do not go as planned, and the cameras that were meant to capture tender illicit love-making become witness to something that is beyond the realm of human understanding… something metaphysical… and they find themselves trapped under the spell of an angry vile spirit who plans to keep them in this house forever, turning their “sexcapade” into a living nightmare.”

Hmmmm? Am I ready to see a “shaky cam horror”, Bollywood style? If anything…. it’ll certainly put a different spin on the idea once it takes a trip through the ol’ “cultural filter” to become something for the mainstream Hindi movie audience to enjoy. Both explicit sex and gore aren’t really all that prevalent in Indian film so I figure this ought to be pretty tame by the standards of movies your Favorite Catgirl usually watches, but who knows? Maybe the Indians will pull out all the stops and go crazy with this one….

Wanna know all about it? Well just tiptoe along with me and we’ll take a lil’ peek together then…

“Haunted 3D” (2011) – Hindi Ghost/ Horror

This time… it’s of to India for your Favorite Catgirl in her endless quest to watch every odd foreign horror movie ever released. (At least it seems like that to those who know me best… Hehehe…)

Our synopsis? Well it goes like this:  “Set in the misty mountains of Koti, “Haunted 3D” revolves around the sprawling Glen Manor, a mansion with a secret past and a haunted present. The hero, Rehan, visits Glen Manor to complete its sale, which his father had initiated. But once he realizes that certain mysterious occurrences in the manor may jeopardize the sale, he investigates these inexplicable happenings and discovers a secret—only to fall in love with it! What he does not bargain for is that the secret brings him face to face with terror, the like of which he could never conceive.”

As the poster proclaims… this is India’s first foray into the recent 3D movie craze, and the DVD presents the film in this format… coming with no less than 4 pairs of those goofy red/blue paper glasses you need for this sort of thing… Sigh…. Not exactly this lil’ lady’s favorite movie fad, I almost passed on this one, but finding a copy at a really nice price convinced me to take a chance. Want to find out if it’s worth your effort to see?

Then you know the drill by now… “Read On” o’ gentle Visitors!

"Kaalo" (2010) – Hindi Horror/ Thriller

Another big ol’ delivery of DVD’s has reached your Favorite Catgirl’s mailbox and so it’s back to India this time for another wacky Hindi horror offering, 2010′s  “Kaalo” aka “Kaalo the Witch”.

Our synopsis reads: “Kaalo tells the story of a deadly witch returning from beyond the grave who attacks a bus in the deserts of Rajasthan and hunts down a little girl. Based on a folktale, the story of Kaalo revolves around a desert dwelling witch by the same name who lived in Kulbhata during the 18th century. She was stoned to death and buried by angry villagers for sacrificing young nubile girls to satisfy her greed for immortality. But, somehow, her evil spirit lived on.

A century later villagers spoke of Kaalo’s sightings yet again. They claimed she was even more angry and dangerous than before and that she was back to finish what she had left incomplete. Kulbhata village was vacated overnight by the frightened locals. All roads leading to Kulbhata were sealed by horrifying folkstories of Kaalo killing anyone who dared to enter Kulbhata until a bus carrying eleven passengers on its way to Kuldevi had to pass through the cursed place. One of the passengers on the bus was a twelve-year-old girl named Shona who was traveling alone to spend her vacation at her grandmother’s house in the neighboring village. Shona was clever, witty and cheerful. She soon became the life of the journey. Everyone loved her endearing manners. Especially the reclusive and reticent Sameer, who was traveling with a bag loaded with gun powder to blast a well for his drought plagued village. Unfortunately for them all, raised from her grave accidentally by foolish quarrymen, Kaalo awoke…. thirsty for blood. Shona’s blood…… “

Now that definitely sounds promising…. Evil child eating cannibal witch with big ol’ halberd chases people around the deserts of India. Why wouldn’t Neko want to watch this one? It certainly looks like it might be a whole lot of goofy monster movie fun!! Neko likes monsters…. especially freaky cannibal monsters…. and it’s about time for me to get a heapin’ dose of flesh munchin’ fun, Hindi style. So naturally I’m all over this one.

Think maybe you too could give “Kaalo” a try? Then by all means… “Read On” and find out for sure….

"Hisss" (2010) – Hindi Snake Woman Horror

Ummm?? Hindi snake women? Yep… India has a long tradition of movies featuring the fertility spirit/ goddess “Naagin” and recently yet another version, this time written and directed by American Jennifer Lynch, has been added to that long list of films. I’ve heard about this one for a while, and even though most reviews I read don’t exactly make it sound like the best “East meets West” collaboration going, I’ve been curious about it since the first stills and teasers hit the internet about a year ago.

The synopsis for it goes like this: “Legend says that Immortality can be gained by he who is able to seize the mystic diamond, the Naagmani, from she who holds it, the Goddess Nagin, but only if you risk her terrible wrath.

A foolish American, armed with guns and science, seeks a cure for his terminal cancer by kidnapping the cobra lover of the Serpent Goddess bringing down her vengeful curse on all who stand between her and that which she seeks to recover.

Can a rational policeman become a believer? Can he stop the killings or only become a victim himself? What will be the outcome when myth meets the Modern world?”

Neko has never let a few bad reviews stand between her and some tasty bit of cinema fantasy, so naturally I grabbed up a copy as soon as one became available. Think sexy snake women on the rampage might be up your alley as well? Guess you’ll want to “Read On” then and find out all about this one then, eh?

"Help" (2010) – Hindi Ghost/ Horror

December moves along towards Christmas, and as always, your Favorite Catgirl is caught up in the busy “Real World” things that conspire to steal away all my time here at the ol’ Litterbox. Worry not though… I’m still catchin’ the occasional movie, like this time out’s Hindi horror goodie, “Help”. Another recent “Bollywood” ghost story, hopefully with all the necessary scares and chills to go along with the usual “song & dance” I’ve come to expect from our good friends in Mumbai.

Our synopsis goes like this: “Help” is a supernatural horror that draws upon the story of a malevolent spirit that refuses to leave the human world. The story concerns, Vic (Bobby Deol) who is a successful horror film director in Bollywood and is married to Pia (Mugdha Godse). Pia and Vic are having marital problems and in the midst of their troubled marriage, they have to rush Mauritus to visit Pia’s ailing father.

Little do they know that there’s something ancient and dark that remains still, hidden and silent in the old house where Pia grew up. As the darkness spreads, things start to get worse and the spirit tries to annihilate everything. Now Vic and Pia must race against time to find out the secret which will save their lives.”

Mmmmm…. Now Neko likes her ghosts, and lately India has been particularly good to me, so is it hard to guess I’d be excited to get yet another chance to sample the horrors of the Hindi movie scene? Nawww……

The poster and the Trailer looked good… but then the only certain way to find out is to actually watch it… or be lucky enough to have a friendly lil Catgirl like me around to tell ya all about it!!

“Click” (2010) – Hindi Ghost/ Horror

Another day off from work, and another review for you all!! This time, it’s yet one more of the Hindi horror films that showed up in your Favorite Catgirl’s mailbox last week, the Hindi ghost story “remake” of the Thai classic “Shutter”…. “Click”.

Our synopsis sounds awfully familiar…. and goes sorta like this: “Avi (Shreyas Talpade) while dating a model Sonia (Sada) is a successful photographer. They hit a girl while driving back from a party and decide to run. A ghostly picture starts appearing in all of Avi’s photographs after this incident. Three of Avi’s friends are killed one by one and both Sonia is convinced it is the girl’s ghost after them.”

This one is another of the many “uncredited”…  almost direct scene for scene remakes done by the Hindi film industry. Practically any successful movie done anywhere eventually gets the “Bollywood” treatment to make the story more palatable for their domestic audience. So then? How close will the Hindi film copy the Thai one? Will it manage to equal the chills while weaving in those peculiarly goofy “Bollywood” elements we’ve all come to know …and sometimes fear more than the ghosts themselves? Well Neko’s never been one to let a little thing like blatant plot rip-off get between me and a movie, especially a ghost story, so I guess I’ll find out.

You wanna know more, you say? Then all you gotta do is “Read On”!!

“Rokkk” (2010) – Hindi Black Magic/ Horror/ Thriller

Another review, and it’s off to exotic India again for another curry flavored Bollywood horror goodie. This time out your Favorite Catgirl Movie Fanatic, has another Indian DVD import titled “Rokkk” ready to send those chills down my lil’ spine.

The synopsis? Well it goes like this: “Anushka (Tanushree Dutta) marries a widower Ravi (Sachin Khedekar) against her mother’s wishes. Just when the duo is about celebrate a year of their married life in a new house in Goa, the nightmare begins. It turns out the house is haunted and the evildoer behind inexplicable events is no older than a little girl. Haunted by the girl’s ghost, Anushka approaches a healer who tells her that the house is cursed and there is a definite link to Ravi’s dead wife. Things then take a turn when Ravi is murdered and the blame falls squarely on Anushka who’s then sent to a mental asylum to gain her sanity back. But the ghost follows her there. Anushka just about manages to flee.

Enter Anushka’s sister Ahaana (Udita Goswami) who, with the help of a police inspector (Shaad Randhawa) tries to unearth the mystery behind the haunted house and save her sister, and later on herself, from the curse of the evil spirit.”

Certainly sounds like a ghost story to this lil’ Catgirl, and you all know how Neko just dotes on her silly ghost stories….. The price is nice, and it’s all subtitled in English and ready to go. Naturally I just had to grab a copy for my viewing pleasure. Will I like it as much as “Phoonk”? Guess I’ll find out!

So can you, o’ Gentle Reader… as always here at the Litterbox, you have only to “Read On” to get all the details for yourself!!

“Mallanna” (2009) – Telugu Superhero/ Action

Yep…. Just when this lil’ Catgirl goes and thinks she’s seen it all, something like this comes along and makes me giggle like a schoolgirl and gasp “Huh?….WTF?!?“ From India, home of some of the downright wackiest cinema in the whole wide world comes “Mallanna”…. a Superhero/ Action/ Romance featuring a dark brooding hero righting wrongs, fighting the forces of evil, and helping the poor and downtrodden…. all while dressed like a giant rooster. Cock-a-doodle-KAPOW!!!

Oh yeah…. Neko just couldn’t miss this one.

Our synopsis for it reads: “The plot revolves around CBI officer Mallanna, along with his oldest school friends, granting the wishes of the needy people who write letters to a local  Temple, disguised like an anthropomorphic chicken. During a CBI income tax raid, he discovers that Ponnusamy, a rich important entrepreneur, is hiding illicit money. To escape the questioning, Ponnusamy pretends to be paralyzed. The event angers his daughter Subbulakshmi who returns home from school abroad to go after Mallanna, pretending to love him, seeking her revenge. This forms a cat and mouse chase between the two. While he is also sought after by a local police inspector who tries to solve the mystery of “Lord Mallanna saving the people,” the fate of Mallanna’s disguise leads into the climax of the story.”

Like all Indian film… this one is a hard movie to describe in a quick fashion. Yes, yes….. it’s a Superhero movie…. but it’s also an action film, a comedy, a romance as well as… of course… a musical as well. But… can they really somehow outdo Batman with a story about a guy in a rooster costume?

There’s only one way to find out, and that’s for your Favorite Catgirl to pick up a copy of the newly released DVD and find out. Will it be a movie you’ll want to see as well?

Guess you’ll just have to “Read On!!” and find out… silly!!